Ten Years Later

I was 42, "ramping down" after a summer of travel to Hong Kong and Sao Paulo with Bank of America, working at home to develop additional coaching and leadership training for the bank. Part of my duties included the delivery of training in various areas, and Spokane was next up. My United Airlines flight DEN-GEG (Spokane) was Monday evening, and after overnighting at a Courtyard in Spokane, I'd have a full day providing a process improvement class to an eager group of new managers from all across Washington State.

My flight out of Denver International Airport was the epitome of routine. To this day, I clearly remember the bored look on the security guard's face as I swiftly walked through the metal detector and gathered my stuff for the flight. The trip was smooth, Channel 9 (air traffic control) was available to listen to, and we made a nice landing. I got to add GEG to my growing list of airports I had traversed, with my return set for later the next day.

It was September 10, 2001.

The next morning I was up early - 6 AM Pacific Time, 9 AM Eastern Time. I flipped the hotel room's TV to NBC for local news and was surprised to note that the Today Show was on live - on the West Coast, the program was usually delayed to start at 7 AM local time. A building was on fire...a big building...the World Trade Center in New York. Katie Couric and Matt Lauer were speculating about a small plane crash. "Hmmm..." I mused. "This'll be on the evening news tonight." And I promptly padded to the bathroom to take a shower.

Coming out of the shower and dressing, I continued to watch the live pictures on the Today Show. And I along with millions of others witnessed the second plane hitting the South Tower.

It's amazing what the mind will process in a couple of milliseconds. My thoughts went from "Oh my God, what's wrong with these pilots? It's a beautiful clear day in New York - how can two of you be so blind?" to "Wait a minute - one crash is an oddity...two is a pattern..." to "Oh my God...this is deliberate." in less time than it takes to blink. Within perhaps ten seconds I realized I likely wasn't flying home that day.

The rest of the morning is a blur in my memories today - obviously, we cancelled the training session; half the class was intending to fly over from Seattle and they were grounded before they took off. A few local bank managers and I watched a TV in the hotel's meeting room...and were there for the collapse of both towers. It's the only time in my life where I have been in a group of dozens of trainees, hotel staff and other guests, all in a state of mass shock.

Hertz was exemplary that day. "Just keep the rental car and try to get home," the lady at the airport counter said. "We'll figure it all out later." My boss at the bank, John Henessey, was equally supportive, even though he was in about the same state of incomprehensibility about the events as I was. I commenced to drive generally east, back to Denver, noting that at least the way home avoided any major metropolitan areas in case there were further waves. (And I think most of us felt there would be.)

It took three days to get home, with overnights north of Salt Lake City and outside of Laramie, Wyoming. When I returned to DIA to pick up my personal car, the Hertz people were amazing in the face of the attack, but very clear in their instructions: You'll get on our bus. Your bus will be stopped and checked at least three times before entering the parking garage at the airport. You will tell the driver where your car is and he will stop. You'll have 60 seconds to get out, start your car and move towards the exit. No loitering, no pausing for anything. You'll be cleared at a checkpoint before leaving the airport.

Believe me, it was the closest to a wartime situation I've ever experienced.

Beautiful Denver International Airport was ghostly - ground stop, no flights in or out. (They resumed a couple of days later with quite different security from September 10.) As I got into my car I felt for a moment like the last man alive.

Ten years later...and to a large extent, the anxiety, foreboding, and worry are still there. We live in a world forever changed. In many ways we're in a "lost decade" because of the consequences of that horrible day ten years ago. While we immediately went on the offensive in Afghanistan, I feel that we detoured to Iraq, lost focus, took 10 years to get Osama bin Laden and lost additional thousands of American lives with not so much to show for it.

Some of this anxiety, no doubt, stems from my current job situation; and there have certainly been fun times, great joy and magnificent events in the ten years since 9/11. But the events of that day remain like a milky film on reality, and so many things we have to live with in 2011 - the Great Recession, the permanent heightened security, the erosion of liberty, the rise of regulation, the financial and housing crises, the inability of government to work - all have their roots in September 11, 2001.